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Latest Kingdom Update Reveals Everyone Literally Gets Own Vine And Fig Tree

Another traveller has returned from the afterlife, bringing the wonderful news that in the Kingdom everyone literally gets their own vine and fig tree to sit under.

If you're a Christadelphian and you had been eyeing off that nice vine or fig tree down at the local garden centre but were a little unsure on the price, well you can now hold off on that purchase because you'll be getting one of each to enjoy all to yourself in the Kingdom, for free!

It appears the biblical literalists were right again and the prophet Micah was not actually speaking metaphorically when he foretold of this amazing future time.

We have also been asked to increase the Christadelphian preaching efforts in order to get a lot more people into the Kingdom. It turns out the land is also literally flowing with milk and honey, and they're having some difficulty with the cleanup effort.

Attendance was down again this week.

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